There is a part of me – the creative part – that is okay with spending the day staring at the ceiling and letting my brain empty of all the noise. There is another part of me – the part that likes to eat – that needs to pay the bills and so must actually produce some work for my contracts once in a while.
I work for myself, from home, doing contract work. It’s heaven. Except when it’s hard.
It can be very hard when I’m struggling to be productive, and I know the only thing that will push me into the zone where I will get things done is if I go drink a big glass of coke and eat a huge block of cheese. The boost will push me along far enough until I can get into the zone and get shit done.
But in the meantime, I’ve just digested 10 tsps of sugar and a whomping 500 + calories of cheese (estimation because I’ve never been able to figure out what a 1 inch cube of cheese really looks like, but I’m pretty sure I just ate five times that amount).
I’m reading Salt, Sugar, Fat by Michael Moss and I just spent the whole morning reading about how Coca Cola is engineered to make me drink it. I resolved to be stronger. I resolved to use my educated understanding of the chemicals and how they interplay with my brain to stop drinking coke. And then I went downstairs, poured myself a glass, and sat down to do some work.
Is there a 12 step program for sugar addiction? I imagine there is. If they included a workshop on productivity without chemical enhancements, it would be gold.
I think I could overcome any addiction as long as I didn’t have to use my brain at all during the withdrawal period.